Babies. There's something magical about these tiny beings that makes mums cherish babyhood so much and look forward to having a newborn in the house. The soft hair, delicate skin, sweet scent, tiny toes, funny gurgles, toothless grins, infectious smiles - these are things you can't get enough of and if you don't cherish them now, they'll be gone before you realise it.
Having three babies doesn't make any one less special. In fact, it makes me treasure babyhood so much and be thankful that I get to go through this phase not once, but thrice. Here's a heartfelt letter dedicated to the youngest in my house. My son, please take your time to grow....
Dear Baby Asher,
Mummy was so happy to discover that you were in my tummy on 26 April 2015, which happened to be Daddy and Mummy's 7th wedding anniversary. I had been wanting a third baby for a long time and it just didn't happen till you came along. Month after month, I would go to the pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test kit and would feel the disappointment and emptiness whenever it came out negative. So, you can imagine my euphoria when I finally saw the '+' sign. I didn't mind if you were going to be a boy or a girl, I just hoped that you could be born safely and join our happy family.
Time flew past and we found out you were going to be our baby boy. Daddy wanted to name you Ace but I preferred the name Asher. We spent the next few months talking about this and getting opinions from friends and family. Well, guess Mummy won eventually. The name 'Asher' means 'happiness' in Hebrew and I can't think of a more apt name (that starts with A like your sisters) for you, my boy.
On 20 December 2015, you made your way into this world and we were so elated to meet you for the first time. You had the pinkest face I had ever seen, you had a cute mob of black hair, you were the perfect size for the crook of my arm and when you opened your eyes to peek at me, you made my heart whole and took my breath, and all my pain, away.
You know how they always wish babies 快高长大 during their full month parties? Well, to be honest, I don't write that as a wish, especially when it comes to my own kids. Wait, it's not that I don't wish for you to grow taller and bigger, I do, of course. My kids' safety and health are of utmost importance to me. It's just that I think babyhood is tooooo precious and I hope we can all take our time to savour and treasure every fleeting moment.
My baby, I hope you will take your time to grow because....
I love to cradle you in my arms, pat your bum bum and rock you gently to sleep. It's such a joy knowing that I'm the No.1 most important person to you right now and even if that means you keep waking up in the middle of night, I'm glad to be the one to soothe and comfort you every time.
I love to wear you against my chest when we go out and feel your heart beating against mine. Since you are not mobile yet, I like that my legs are your legs and together, we can explore the world and stick together as one.
I love to hear your goo-s and ga-s and on occasions when you let out sounds like "Ma-Ma", you make me fly to the moon and back. It's funny that although you can't really talk yet, we are communicating and learning so much about each other every day.
I love that you let me kiss you a thousand times a day, on your cheeks, on your forehead, on your nose, on your arms, on your feet, on your tummy, on your lips and anywhere I want. I don't care what scientists say about passing germs through kissing, I simply can't imagine going through a day without kissing you, my dear.
I love that you open up your arms and reach for me whenever you want me to carry you. You don't shun me, you don't mind getting lovey dovey with me in front of others, you shower me with so much love that makes my heart full every day.
I love that I get to breastfeed you so many times a day and get to cuddle in bed with you. I like to look at you suckling away, I like the way our skins touch, I like how you calm down magically when you are in my arms and I love this special mother-and-baby bond we have.
I love to feel your little fingers and the way you rest your palm on mine, the way you hold tightly onto my finger, the way you tug at my shirt, the way you pull my hair and the way you sometimes pinch me all remind me that I am so blessed to have a tiny one who depends on me.
I love to be greeted by your wide smile every morning and you never fail to chase my blues away. I love hearing your laughter and how you will still be amused after I do the same thing two dozen times. I love your innocence, your curiosity, your cheerful disposition and your pure heart.
If there's one thing I learnt about being a mum, it's to learn from the past, hope for the future and most importantly, cherish the present. For now, I'm definitely making the most of each and every moment I get to be with you, my darling boy. You light up my life and brought me joy in ways that you will never know (perhaps you will when you become a daddy someday) and I hope you will always continue to be positive; to laugh, smile, spread love and make this world a better place.
P.S. You are a huge baby for a 4-month-old and everyone thinks you are at least 8 months old, you know? I love seeing how strong and tall you are growing up to be and I hope I can carry you, hug you, kiss you and call you my "baby boy" for awhile longer. Love ya so much!